专家谈翻译资格考试“八戒”（2）

五、戒结构单调，组合生硬 拉郎配

由于汉英结构不同，表达方式迥异，硬性翻译不仅读起来别扭，而且会闹出笑话。这就要求译者在翻译时灵活使用整合的技巧，将句子整合，凸显汉语中所隐含的层次，补充所缺失的成分。有时要将简单句译成并列句，有时将并列句译成主从句。

在纪念大学毕业20周年聚会时，我忽然问起原来的班主任：我个子又不矮，怎么把我安排在了第一排呢？

At the reunion party for 20 anniversary of graduation from university, I suddenly asked my former teacher in charge of our class then:" Since I am not of short stature, how did you arrange me at the first row?"

一个高度近视的女博士去擦鞋店擦高统靴，秃头老板亲自蹲下来给她效劳。

When a woman doctor who suffers a severe myopic went to shoes-polishing shop for her buskins，the bald boss squatted down to serve her personally.

黑体字部分，正是契合了英语的表达习惯。

六、戒愚忠，不谙增减之道

我们耳熟能详的东西外国人可能会感到一头雾水，译者需要增加必要的说明和补充或者减译。否则，外国人会不知所云。毕竟，汉译英最终是给外国人看的。

例如：风水

fengshuithe location of a house or tomb, supposed to have an influence on the fortune of a family.

例如：（美国对台）三不政策

会当凌绝顶，一览众山小。

One day I shall climb

Clear to the summit,

See how small surrounding

Mountain tops appear as they lie below me

（新西兰人路易·艾黎译《杜甫·望岳》）

I can't open my eyes to watch you jumping into the fiery pit, for I will shut my eyes at the time.

我不会眼睁睁看着你往火坑里跳，到时候我会闭上的。

不要嫌我黑，两眼放光辉；不要嫌我瘦，一身好精肉。

Do not Cold-shoulder me for my swarthy(黝黑的) face, but I have a pair of bright piercing(敏锐的) eyes;

Do not Cold-shoulder me for my slight figure, but I’m lean and healthy.

文中the location of a house or tomb, supposed to have an influence on the fortune of a family.

on support for Taiwan independence, no support for a two-China policy, and on support for Taiwan membership in international organizations on the basis of statehood.

七、戒语句重复

汉语多重复，以强化语气；英语则要尽量避免重复。

先生曰：狼负我，狼负我！狼曰：吾非固欲负汝。天生汝辈，固需吾辈食也。

"You are an ungrateful beast," complained the man.

"Not at all," retorted the wolf, "it is not that I’m ungrateful, but you men were created for us to devour."

（颜惠庆译《马中锡·中山狼传》）

王曰：此鸟不飞则已，一飞冲天；不鸣则已，一鸣惊人。

"The bird may not have flown yet", replied the King,"Once it does, it will soar to the sky. I may not have cried out yet, but once it does, it will startle everyone."

（杨宪益译《史记·滑稽列传》

阿凡提借了财主一锭金子，还他时给了他两锭。

Afanty borrowed a small ingot of gold from a moneybags, but repaid him two ones.

（选自艾临《幽默新大陆》）

又斗争，又团结，以斗争的手段，达团结之目的。

Unity, struggle, unity through struggle.

中国人也好，外国人也好，死人也好，活人也好，对的就是对的，不对的就是不对的。

What is right is right and what is wrong is wrong, no matter what it concerns, the Chinese or foreigners, the dead or the living.

八、戒另起炉灶，走失精气神，沦为法国作家梅纳日所批评的 不忠的美人即语言优美但不忠于原文。（参见2005年08月26日《济南日报》： 艾临文章《不忠的美人与忠实的美人写在〈每天幽它一默〉出版后》）严复在翻译《天演论》时偶 有为雅而不信 （见陈廷佑《英文汉译技巧》）。译文要力求其信，尽可能契合汉语原来渥拥钠啤⑶樾骱徒峁埂?

例如，元朝人王实甫写下了《西厢记》，张雪静改编后并作了翻译

掏出张生那封信，回头环视见梳妆台上的梳妆盒，眼睛一转，心里说有了，将信放了进去，合上盖时故意压了一角露在外面。

Rose took out Zhang’s letter, she thought, It would be better to put it in her make-up case, and letter find it herself. So she put the letter in the case, leaving a corner of it sticking out, so that it would be quickly noticed.

不难看出，译文与原文相去甚远，互不吻合，成了两张皮。

我们不希望这件事影响中美关系。

China hates to see Sino-US relations damaged by this incident.

用China hates to比We don’t hope贴切。

吾十五有志于学，三十而立，四十而不惑，五十而知天命，六十而耳顺，七十而从心所欲不愈矩。

At fifteen, I had my mind bent on learning truth; at thirty, my words deeds were appropriate; at forty, I perceived truth and doubts ceased; at fifty, I understood what heaven had mandated for mankind; at sixty, I could comply with the appointments of heaven; at seventy, I could do as my heart desired, and never swerved from the path of right.

（金沛霖译《论语》）

你已经死在过深的怨愤里了吗？

死？不，不，我还活着

请给我以火，给我以火！

Have you perished in this deep rancor and bitterness?

Death? No, no. I’m still alive.

Please give me a light, give me a light!