法律翻译几点主要环节

所在位置：翻译公司 > 翻译案例 > 翻译领域　/ 日期：2017-11-04 20:39:57　/ 来源：网络

一、拼写或识词错误

1. defendant (被告)

2. respondent (答辩人，<上诉、离婚等案件的>被告)
3. dependent (附属的，受抚/赡养的；受抚/赡养人)
例句：对当事人双方的诉讼标的，第三人认为有独立请求权的，有权提起诉讼。
译文：A third party who deems himself entitled to an independent claim with regard to the subject matter of both parties has the right to initiate an action.
1. causal (原因的，有关因果的)
2. casual(偶然的，临时的，随便的)
例句：在被告过失与原告所受伤害之间，肯定有一个因果关系。
译文：There must be a causal connection between the defendant’s negligence and the plaintiff’s injury.
• a casual meeting，巧遇；
• a casual visitor, 不速之客；
• casual expenses，临时费用；
• a casual remark，随口的插话
1. council (n. 理事会，联席会，商谈会)
2. counsel (n. 协商，忠告；法律顾问，律师v. 劝告，协商)
例句：被告人有权获得律师帮助为其辩护。
译文：The accused enjoys the right to the Assistance of Counsel for his defence.
• the State Council （中国的）国务院
1. effect (vt. 实现，使生效；招致)
2. affect (vt. 影响，感动，侵袭，假装)
例句：履行地点不明确，给付货币的，在接受给付一方的所在地履行，其他标的在履行义务一方的所在地履行。
译文：If the place of performance is unclear, and the payment is money, the performance shall be effected at the place of residence of the party receiving the payment; if the payment is other than money, the performance shall be effected at the place of residence of the party fulfilling the obligation.

二、语法错误

当地警方证实，2012年6月4日，涉嫌在加拿大蒙特利尔杀害并肢解一名中国留学生的一名29岁加拿大色情男演员在柏林被捕。
On June 4, 2012, a 29-year-old Canadian porn actor suspected with killing and dismembering (肢解) a Chinese student in Montreal, Canada, was arrested in Berlin, local police authorities confirmed.
修改要点：with→of
suspect sb. of doing sth.怀疑某人做人事。
任何国家机关、社会团体和个人不得强制公民信仰宗教或者不信仰宗教，不得歧视信仰宗教的公民和不信仰宗教的公民。
No state organ, public organization and individual may compel citizens to believe in, or not to believe in, any religion; nor may they discriminate citizens who believe in, or do not believe in, any religion.
修改要点：
1. and→ or;
2. discriminate → discriminate against
• discriminate v. 区分;
• ~ between A and B, ~ from A and B 差别对待;
• ~ against 歧视;
• ~ in favor of 优待
明知自己的行为会发生危害社会的结果，并且希望或者放任这种结果发生，因而构成犯罪的，是故意犯罪。
An intentional crime refers to an act committed by a person who clearly knows that his act will cause social dangerous consequences but who hopes or allows such consequences to occur, thus constituting a crime.
修改要点：
1. social→ socially;
2. hopes→ wishes

三、术语错误

对当事人双方的诉讼标的，第三人认为有独立请求权的，有权提起诉讼。
A third party who deems himself entitled to an independent request with regard to the subject matter of both parties has the right to bring a prosecution.
修改要点：
1. request → claim;
2. bring a prosecution (刑事诉讼；控诉方，公诉方)→ initiate an action。
人民法院有权要求当事人提供或补充证据。
The People’s Court shall have the right to request the parties to provide or supplement evidence.
修改要点：
1. shall have→ has；
2. right→ authority (authority, 凭职位而享有的、可对他人行使的权力；right，个人的权利；power, 个人享有的、法律赋予的某种权力);
3. request →require。

四、理解错误

In the determination of any criminal charge against him, everyone shall be entitled to the following minimum guarantees, in full equality: (e) To examine, or have examined, the witnesses against him and to obtain the attendance and examination of witnesses on his behalf under the same conditions as witnesses against him.
原译文：在判定对他提出的任何刑事指控时，人人完全平等地有资格享受以下的最低限度的保证：（戊）讯问或业已讯问对他不利的证人，并使对他有利的证人在与对他不利的证人相同的条件下出庭和受讯问。
修改为：
• 判定对他→判定对任何人；
• （戊）讯问或业已讯问受讯问→由本人或让其他人询问对其不利的证人，并使对其有利的证人与对其不利的证人在相同条件下出庭和接受询问。
中华人民共和国的国家机构实行民主集中制的原则。国家行政机关、审判机关、检察机关都由人民代表大会产生，对它负责，受它监督。中央和地方的国家机构职权的划分，遵循在中央的统一领导下，充分发挥地方的主动性、积极性的原则。
原译文：The state organs of the People’s Republic of China apply the principle of democratic centralism. All administrative, judicial and procuratorial organs of the state are created by the people’s congresses to which they are responsible and under whose supervision they operate. The division of functions and powers between the central and local state organs is guided by the principle of giving full play to the initiative and enthusiasm of the local authorities under the unified leadership of the central authorities.
修改提示：此处的机构是个整体概念，而机关是它的具体组成部分，二者不能等同；division 可表示分配，分割、分裂，而distribution表示分配、配置，后者更准确。
修改要点：
• The state organs of the People’s Republic of China apply the principle of democratic centralism. →In the state machine of the People’s Republic of China, the principle of democratic centralism is applied.
• The division of functions and powers between the central and local state organs is guided by→The distribution of functions and powers in the state machine between the central and local state organs is guided by
国务院设立审计机关，对国务院各部门和地方各级政府的财政收支，对国家的财政金融机构和企业事业组织的财务收支，进行审计监督。
原译文：The State Council establishes an auditing body to supervise through auditing the revenue and expenditure of all departments under the State Council and of the local governments at different levels, and those of the state financial and monetary organizations and of enterprises and undertakings.
修改提示：审计监督应当理解为一个独立概念，而非通过审计这种途径所进行的监督。
修改要点：to supervise through auditing→ to exercise auditorial control over
说明： enterprises and undertakings (enterprise，事业，企业；进取心 <a man of enterprise>；undertaking, 事业，企业；承担，许诺)→ non-profit and profit-seeking enterprises。

五、表述错误 (语言不地道，用词不当等)

Everyone is entitled to a social and international order in which the rights and freedoms set forth in this Declaration can be fully realized. (set forth, 阐明，提出)
原译文：人人有权要求一种社会的和国际的秩序, 在这种秩序中, 本宣言所载的权利和自由能获得充分实现。
修改为：人人有权要求一种能充分实现本宣言所载权利和自由的社会的国际秩序。
一审法院认定2005年5月14日上诉人与被上诉人签订的房屋租赁合同为无效合同，于法无据。
原译文：The first-instance court ascertained that the house lease contract signed by the Appellant and the Respondent on May 14, 2005 was invalid. This ruling is not law-based.
修改要点：
• the house lease contract →the residential lease contract;
• signed by the Appellant and the Respondent →signed between the Appellant and the Respondent;
• This ruling is not law-based. →This ruling has no basis in law.
在此期间未能提出申请的，可以给予六个月的宽限期。
原译文：Where no such application could be filed within that period, an extension period of six months may be granted.
修改提示：no could意思是(当时)没有能够，并非未能。 extension period 用词不当。到期之后的宽限期（期满后允许迟延履行的额外期间，无需履行迟延责任），英文表述为grace period (grace本意是恩惠，优惠), 这与extension period (延长的期限，未必排除延期责任) 并不等同。
修改为：→The registrant who fails to make such an application within that period may be granted a grace period of six months.

六、过于繁琐( redundant)

人民依照法律规定，通过各种途径和形式，管理国家事务，管理经济和文化事业，管理社会事务。
原译文：The people administer state affairs and manage economic, cultural and social affairs through various channels and in various ways in accordance with the law.
修改提示：汉语擅用排比，英文无此习惯。此处可以将各种事务连起来，一气呵成。
修改为：The people administer state, economic, cultural and social affairs through
民事诉讼当事人不服地方人民法院第一审判决的，有权在判决书送达之日起十五日内向上一级人民法院提起上诉。
原译文：If a litigant in civil proceedings disagrees to a judgment of first instance rendered by a local people’s court, he or she has the right to appeal to the people’s court at the next higher level within 15 days upon the service of the court verdict.
修改提示：可用后置定语，使行文简洁。
修改为：
• A litigant in civil proceedings dissatisfied with a judgment of first instance rendered by a local people’s court may appeal to (render，作出；给予，提供)；
• the court verdict (verdict指陪审团裁决)→ the judgment。
合资企业应向中国银行或中国银行批准的银行开立账户。
原译文：A joint venture shall open an account with the Bank of China or a bank approved by the Bank of China.
修改提示：可用thereby使行文简洁。
修改为：A joint venture shall open an account with the Bank of China or a bank approved thereby.

七、滥用标点

企业和政府有关部门的领导干部，因工作过失给企业和国家造成较大损失的，由政府主管部门或有关上级机关给予行政处分。
原译文：Leading cadres of enterprises and governmental departments concerned, who have caused the enterprises and the state big losses due to work faults, shall be disciplined by the competent government agency or its superior agency.
修改提示：cause sb. sth. 结构不当；定语从句的逗号使用不当。
修改为：Leading cadres of enterprises and governmental departments concerned who have caused big losses to the profit-seeking enterprises and the state owing to their negligence in work shall be disciplined by the competent government agency or its superior agency.
修改说明：
(1) cause sb. sth. 结构应当改为cause sth. to sb.结构。
(2) 去掉定语从句的逗号，因为：限制性定语从句起明确的限定作用，在句中不可缺少，否则会影响句子的含义。非限制性定语从句通常起补充说明作用，删除后一般也不影响句子的主要思想；有时相当于一个分句；修饰具有唯一性的名词时，要用非限制性定语从句。
例如：
When he was 18, he went to a technical school in London, which was the largest city he had ever seen. (逗号不能删除)

Then he met Mary, who (and she) invited him to a party. (逗号不能删除)